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Showing posts from September, 2025

25 weeks: A New Year's Wish

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 Dear Friends, You all have been companions with me for what next week will be six months since Sue passed away. Last week you received a message from Sue through me which I think she would have wanted to share if she was alive and was reading these blogs. I want to share my response as I continue to be blessed with so much support which I could have never imagined that I would receive. Yesterday, I was privileged to lead services for a congregation in South Carolina and together we made it through a very emotional Rosh Hashanah service.  When the Cantor (musical leader) chanted the Avinu Malkeinu which is a prayer which helps us relate to G-d as both parent and sovereign and is when we ask G-d to inscribe us in the book of life,  the tears were flowing. However, the most impactful part of those sacred moments while we were chanting the prayer (please see the attachment below which will give a sense of the spirituality of these heartfelt pleas and please search Avinu...

24 weeks...the first Rosh Hashanah

 Dear Friends, I hope you will forgive me but I needed to interrupt Bruce's blogs to share my message with him and you.   I loved Bruce more than anything and treasure all the time we were blessed with together.  But, I need to be honest here and Bruce, I hope you are listening.   I know you say you are existential and not a worrier.  Well, what if we compromise and we agree you are both.  And I know you remember on rare occasions, I would say to you that you said that already and actually would be annoyed with you. Well, I am going to say it now...You have said you are sad enough now.  We know this and I am also sad.  There is a difference, Bruce, between you and me.  I am not dwelling on the sadness...I am celebrating the joy. To those of you who are reading this, I hope you will forgive me for including some lyrics.  I guess being married to Bruce, quoting lyrics is contagious.  By the way, sometimes the fact that I really was a ...

Seeking Forgivess, The Dream, and Does this guy ever stoping whining

 Dear Friends, I know I am cluttering your inbox, but as my brother has told me on a number of occasions after his wife died more than three years ago, he is lonely but never alone. Well last night the lonely meter went through the roof and I know when I write to you that so many of you care and I know I am not alone. So please forgive this blog about my spiritual wrestling match which you can certainly delete as you wish.  But, if you choose to read this, I welcome any guidance, advice, coping mechanisms, or support you can offer me.  It is a lonely morning although it will be filled with a number of activities today which will serve to keep me occupied and from moping too much. Last night was our Selichot services which are filled with prayers encouraging us to be forgiving.  I know that this first High Holiday season without Sue being alive will be tough but I guess I didn't realize just how tough it would be. Before the service the Cantor (musical and prayer lead...

23 Weeks...the journey continues

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  Dear Friends, We are reaching the time of year in the Jewish calendar where we have our selichot services and programs tomorrow night.  On a Saturday night before Rosh Hashanah, our new year, we do penitential prayers and have an opportunity to do more intense soul searching in preparation for making the changes in our lives which we are hoping to make in the new year. I have been told that between five and six months is an intense time in the mourning process and that one might have to cope with some more intense grief and the loss becomes even more real as one realizes that their loved one is not physically returning. I am glad someone out there in cyberspace told me this because it is so real.  As it turns out, I heard the following song by Joan Baez on satellite radio and well if one substitutes "Susie" for Jesse, you get the picture....(See below) So this has become a very challenging week and I turned to a poem that was given to me by eith...

Five Months...22 weeks

Dear Friends, The journey continues....I continue to be surrounded by so many people that are loving and caring.  A former student checked in yesterday and when I told them how hard a day it was,  actually asked their Mom and a friend to spend Shabbat dinner with me last night so I would not be alone.  I mean, who does that for a Professor.???? I continue to think about the role that G-d is playing in this entire experience and continue to wonder if the Shechinah (G-d's Feminine Presence in this world that is merciful and loving, You can look this up to get more information) is embracing me through the love of so many of you. I continue to gather information and realized this week after speaking to a couple of doctors that the story, "Travels with Elijah" where Elijah teaches a colleague that sometimes things happen and we don't realize they are happening for the best, may be descriptive of Sue's sudden death.  See the link below for the book...