Rabbi Bruce's Reflections on Life

Dear Friends, As I spend time with family in the Midwest before Thanksgiving and other family members and friends in VA during Thanksgiving week, I am thinking a lot about the first Thanksgiving since Sue passed away. As often happens I was driving and the following song came on the radio which reminded me of so much of what I have felt and want to express as Thanksgiving approaches.  (See below. Please put the titles into your browser to hear the songs) As the lyrics in the song say, They say that all good things must end someday Autumn leaves must fallBut don't you know that it hurts me so To say goodbye to you? Wish you didn't have to go No, no, no, noAnd when the rain beats against my window pane I'll think of summer days again And dream of you. When I visited Sue's parents' graves last week, I was reminded of what her father said when we would recite the motzi or prayer before eating bread.  He would say, "let's all say baruch (blessing)." ...

Dear Friends, I am writing this blog after having visited the Temple in Champaign, Illinois  where Sue and I were married.  I wanted to see where we met at the University of Illinois, and to reflect on the wonder of beginning a 50 year love affair.  We began the affair in Hebrew class where I got her convicted in a trial in Hebrew and her response to my teasing was to stick her tongue out at me.  I was smitten in that moment and Sue was smitten when I took a picture of an older couple on a walk through the Presidential gardens a couple days later.  We attended services for our first date where I lied to get her to attend by telling her my roommate was going with his girlfriend and I didn't want to be a third.  My roommate had no intent on going but did and so Sue came with me.  The rest is history.... I drove past the dorm where we lived, went to Hillel, the building where the Jewish students meet and attended a service there.  I went into the coffee house across from the Fine Art...

Dear Friends, As we begin the month of November where we celebrate Thanksgiving and give thanks for all our blessings, I want to write about a number of things that should bring joy to all of us as we continue to miss Sue so very much. This week, an old friend reached out and reminded me of something I have taught so many people over the years. Death may end a life but it never ends a relationship. And to all of you who knew Sue, I know that our relationships with Sue will always remain strong because love and kindness matter. The Psalmist tells us that love conquers death and so our relationships with her will always remind us of hope and optimism in the midst of despair and challenges. I continue to need you to remind me about this in the midst of my sadness. Secondly, a cousin of mine found pictures of Sue from when she spent a gap year in Israel working on a Kibbutz. She sent me two pictures of Sue from her time on the Kibbutz (my cousin knew her before I did). I was ab...

 Hi Everyone, Today is seven months since Sue died and needless to say the mood swings are dramatic.  I have been surrounded all day by loving people who are holding my heart and encouraging me through their friendship to hang on when sometimes there is nothing in me except the will which says, "hold on."  (See Rudyard Kipling's poem, "If" to which I have referred before but seems very timely tonight) As I reflect on the ups and downs of the past seven months, I am thinking about the significance of the number seven as it relates to the days of creation and the days of the week.  We recall the number seven and remember that on the seventh day G-d completed creation and rested.  Maybe it is time to celebrate creation and all the kindness and love  which we have created and let grief rest.  Maybe it is time to celebrate the morning of a new day of hope and let mourning rest.  (Easier said than done, but I am trying...) YouTube ·...

Dear Friends, So many of you have been encouraging me to be more joyful in these blogs and to try to capture Sue's joy and the essence of her spirit.   You all know how much I miss her so let me share with you a number of things that have been resonating with me lately.  Perhaps it is the excitement of a game seven in the World Series, or perhaps it was the joyful way in which our neighbors and I exchanged jokes for candy last night during Halloween, or perhaps it was the encouragement of a colleague, or perhaps, it was the love of our children, grandchildren, and relatives and friends, or perhaps it was the support of my friends and colleagues at George Mason, or perhaps it was a young person's comment last night when I asked them how one could tell it is a bad Dad joke and they responded, "because you told it" which had me speechless ( a rarity)... At any rate here goes and please read this entire blog which is lengthy.  I hope you will be glad you did. ...

 Dear Friends, I hope you will forgive me for filling your inbox but as I sit here alone in the house after a beautiful weekend with a couple of you in the midwest (you know who you are), it has been a time to reflect. On Sunday, Oct. 27, 1974 I didn't feel well and Sue came to visit me in the dorm and brought me some chicken soup that she had heated up in the microwave in the lounge   at Blaisdell Hall at the University of Illinois which was part of Pennsylvania Ave. Residence Halls .   I was so very touched by Sue's act of kindness (who knew that this was the beginning of what would be over 50 years of receiving acts of kindness from my beloved friend). Today and tomorrow mark the 51st anniversary of that special moment in our lives.  And, maybe more important than feeling better from the chicken soup which is often known as Jewish penicillin, was what followed. I asked her to marry me and well please listen to the lyrics below and you will understand w...