Rabbi Bruce's Reflections on Life

Hi Everyone, I have been blessed by the presence of so many  of you through email, texts, zoom, meetings, and phone calls. This morning, for the first time during this Holidays season without papers to grade, classes to teach, and meetings to attend, it has hit me that I am home alone.  It has been a challenging morning filled with laughter and tears. I have been reflecting on a number of things and appreciate your willingness to read these emails.  Once again, as a number of you have done, please let me know if you want me to remove your name from my list and I will happily accommodate your request.  Sue would be surprised that any of you are still reading theses and would say to me "you said all this already" although she knew I would continue to say what is in my heart. As I drove back from the Midwest on Saturday and Sunday   and listened to Radio Chanukah, I continued to receive signs of her presence throughout the drive. There was a particularly poignant sign when I...

Dear Friends and Family, As I visit with family without Sue and try to experience the joy  which I know we would have shared together, it has been a tough week. When I was at the airport this morning I asked Sue  to send me a sign or something since I was really struggling as tears fell down my cheeks again (I thought maybe the intensity of the grieving would lessen, but not yet... As the day progressed I will share with  you  the overwhelming number of things that occurred that led me to believe that I was inundated with signs. First some background...When i teach about the Bible, i teach that my  favorite character in the Bible is nameless.  In the Joseph story (many  of  you  will remember this), there is a  character who is referred to as "ha ish" or the person.  It could be any of us and the "person" asks Joseph, "what are you  seeking?"  (or can I help).  The person gives Joseph directions to find his brothers that helps him to survive although ...

Dear Family, Friends, and Students,, Those of you familiar with the Hebrew language know that in Hrebrew letters, the number 18 is represented by the letters which form the Hebrew word Chai, or life. This week it has been double chai months since Sue passed away. Everywhere we went it has been Rabbi Bruce and Sue or Bruce and Sue or Sue and Bruce and as I continue to wrestle with my name change to just Bruce, I had another revelation this week. A friend told me that wherever I journey from here, it is not just as Bruce. Sue will always be right there with me and certainly resides permanently in my heart. So as I continue my journey I had an intense experience at a local retirement home where one of the staff people was able to help me through a pivotal moment in my healing. We were celebrating Chanukah and the activities person put on the song, "Light One Candle" (see below and for those who cannot click on the link, please put the link in your browser to hear Peter...

Dear Friends and Family, As I reflect upon a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with the bitter and the sweet as I wrote about last week, I am overwhelmed this week and have turned to the weekly Torah (Scriptural) reading for inspiration and comfort. I continue to be told that grief is not a linear process and that there will be steps forward and backward.  This blog will reflect my internal wrestling match. If Jewish tradition is relevant here and our lives in this world and the ways we remember our loved ones elevate their souls in the world to come, then I continue to hope and pray that perhaps Sue's soul is at peace and that life, whatever it is, is kinder to her than parts of the last months of her life.  Between the cancer surgery, her time at the dentist dealing with mouth pain, and then the fateful days eight months ago with the heart surgery, I can't help but think that even Susie sunshine as we would sometimes call her, had to be struggling a bit.  I am not the first pe...