34 weeks: Thanksgiving without Sue

Dear Friends, As I write this blog early on the morning before Thanksgiving and I hear a grandchild go into their parents' room and say good morning, I wanted to share a blog I wish I didn't have to write and yet as you  see I must. I have been filled with such strong emotions for almost eight months now and those of you who read these blogs, know that I have opened my soul The intensity of the emotion this morning is at an all time high as I am flooded with wonderful memories, sweet moments, snuggles, sparkles, and am surrounded by the love of family, friends, and so many of my students.  People are reading out from across the globe because they know that Thanksgiving was a sacred day in our home. As I peer through the tears I have turned to a song that was written after the 1973 Yom Kippur War in Israel by Naomi Shemer.  I have included a link to an English translation for the song and hope that you will put the name of the song into your browser and watch and listen to different versions of this beautiful way to think about love and loss.  The name of the song is "Al Kol Eleh."  (See below) The words of this song talk about how life is filled with the bitter and the sweet.  It contains words of prayer that G-d should look after us and my hope and prayer on this Thanksgiving is that G-d is looking after Sue with the care with which you and maybe G-d are looking after me. I have taught for years that as Jews, we fulfill our obligation to pray by saying "amen." with one exception.  We must all find something for which we personally can give thanks and must acknowledge our gratitude.  On this Thanksgiving, I am so passionately  grateful for the blessings of Sue's smiles, snuggles, love, kindness, and sparkling personality that I have mentioned many times.  I long for her love and yet feel her kindness as I watch our family interact and I feel the support of so many  of you. There have been, are, and will most likely always be those who will wonder why bad things happen to good people and will be filled with questions about whether things happen according to G-d's plan.  I take comfort in the faith that perhaps G-d knew something we didn't, but also have challenged G-d as to why her death had to occur.  The roller coaster of emotions would make a carnival ride at any amusement park pale in comparison to the multitude of mood swings. So, what will I be remembering first and foremost tomorrow?  As one of our daughter's in law was showing me that our granddaughter's hair was long enough to make a very small pony tail, I was reminded of the following.  When Sue and I met her hair was very long and she would often put it into pigtails. She called them  "tzeplach."   ( I heard once that this is Yiddish, but don't know for sure)  When I was sad, she would take them and dust the tears and sadness away from my eyes and tell me she loved me. Sue, I long for those "tzeplach" today and can feel you dusting my face as I write this. I love you and you should know our children found cookies you had baked in the freezer.  Maybe you snuck them in since I thought we had eaten everything you had baked????  There is a lot of baking and cooking going on for tomorrow based upon the cookbook you gave another granddaughter which our children are sharing once again with each other. The best ingredient you ever put into one of your recipes was the love which you so generously gave to all of us. Happy Thanksgiving to all and it is bitter and yet is so VERY SWEET. Rabbi Bruce Aft A postscript... The voice I heard.... Dear Bruce, I know this will be a hard day  for you but please read what you wrote and celebrate the sweet. And as you recalled,,,"Dust dust...I love you." Love,Sue “Quarantune” #3: Al Kol Eileh in English YouTube · Cantor Melissa Berman2K+ views · 5 years ago 4:19

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